Wedding Prep and Peacocks

The following week was a rather busy one.

It started with doing a little wedding preparation. This involved me identifying an aspect of the wedding that was not already accounted for, and attempting to "get the ball rolling", so to speak. While the most obvious choice could have been to complete the guestbook (which I had so generously at the time volunteered to do, but failed to complete for the last two months), I focused on starting a new aspect. I began thinking about the wedding programs, both the practical literature content, as well as the presentation. Laura and I had decided that we would print our own trifold programs, and bound them with a blue and silver band that stated our names and the wedding date. My primary focus was to initiate the production of the bands. A considerable amount of thought had to go into such a task (or at least I made it considerable), as I needed to calculate how wide each band could be in order to maximize the printable space on a sheet of paper. Not easy, and also not without spoilage either. Regardless, I accomplished my task, and got them printed and all two-hundred strips of both silver and blue cut. While the strips still need to be glued together, my intent was merely to "get the ball rolling", remember?

Another interesting event this week was the arrival of an unexpected guest. While talking on the phone, I noticed my cat Pooka intently following something through the back door. Assuming that it was the usual neighorhood cat or squirel, I decided to check it out. Quite frankly surprised at what I saw, I quickly got Laura's attention and waived for her to come look. When she got to the window, I asked, "is that a... peacock?!?" She replied, "I think it is!" She quickly grabbed her camera and took pictures. While I was quickly corrected as to the identification of the bird as a peaHEN, it was nonetheless an interesting visitor.

The next morning, I woke up and the peahen was still meandering around the back yard. While having read about their potential for destruction of landscapes and vehicles, I concluded that I would attempt to "shoo her away". One must understand that as I continue, there were no other individuals around to take pictures, as I am sure that any such documentation would have surely provided a more comical depiction of the event that ensued.

Already dressed for work in my shirt and tie, this was probably not the best peahen shooing outfit, but I had anticipated a quick, victorious assault. I exited the house via the front door, and grabbed the broom. As I walked briskly to the back of the house, the creature was not overly startled by the sight of a human (bad sign). Determined, I quickly approached the bird like an elderly woman declaring, "shoo... SHOO!" This only caused the peahen to turn in the other direction toward the side yard. I quickly followed, broom in hand! When it got the the edge of the house, it made a left turn and headed for the front yard. Then, another left turn across the front yard. Realizing that I wanted to merely chase it into the woods behind my house, this was not my intention. Anyway, across the front yard it went and made yet another left and cut across the side of the house where the vehicles are located. Once past the vehicles, the pesty fowl made another left. For all who are counting, yes, that's four lefts. We are right back where we started. Perhaps I should have taken a different course of action, but riding purely on the adreneline of chasing the bird, it was impulse that drove me to follow her as she waddled around the house two more times. While the bird was not fast by any means, I never got too close for fear of it directly attacking me. Its foot (if that is indeed what they are called) size was rather large, accompanied by what appeared to be claws, was intimidating enough, but the shear size of the wing-span when it took flight a couple times (5-6 feet) was honestly frightening. I decided it was best to keep some distance.

After another eight or twelve left turns, the bird seemingly made a mistake and made a right after passing by the pickup truck. Now I was chasing it around the truck, until I stopped to take inventory of the situation. Looking over the cab of the truck, I located her. Extending its neck seemingly like a giraffe, it located me. While staring each other down (a la a bad western) I decided to change my direction! So did the peahen! Then we both stopped and we felt each other's plan of attack out. I moved to the left. She moved to the left. I went right. She went right! It was the proverbial cat and mouse game typically played between two children in movies, only here it was a grown man in shirt and tie, and a peahen! Making one last attempt, I jaunted in one direction. Arriving at the other side of the vehicle, the peahen was gone! It was nowhere to be seen, however, until it emerged from UNDER THE TRUCK on the other side! It quickly scurried to where the chase began in the back yard.

I knew that I had lost. Defeatedly, I returned the broom to the front porch and entered my vehicle. Sitting there, exhausted and unusually sweaty for work, I turned the ignition. As I put the car in reverse, I looked up to see the peahen slowly waddling into the back woods, pecking at the ground. As it slowly left my property, I thought...

VICTORY!